Happy New Year!
Happy New Year!! I trust your holidays have been full and meaningful. As we come to the end of 2015 and are looking forward to 2016, I encourage you to take some time to reflect on how 2015. Humans are wired toward growth and expansion. In fact, in nature nothing ever stays the same. All living things are either growing and expanding or disintegrating and dying. High achievers are [...]
Life Really is Short
I haven’t written a blog post since the beginning of this year. After writing regular posts and creating original content for classes, workshops and programs the last 5 years, I just needed to give myself permission to take a break. So I did . . . and it was good. Then last week something happened . . . something that shook my soul . . . and I felt compelled [...]
Are you Focusing on Fear?
As I was going through old newsletters I have written, I found this personal note . . . one of my “Lessons from the Barn” installments. I decided to share it with you because how you do anything is how you do everything - that means we can learn so much about ourselves in any situation. Horses are particularly helpful in teaching us about ourselves because they are experts at [...]
Ready for a Happy New Year?
Happy New Year!! Now is the start of the start of the “New year, new you” frenzy and it’s easy to get swept away with all the things you don’t like about yourself and resolutions to change them all. What if you could make one resolution that would change so many things in your life? What if the only resolution you made this year was to just be happy NOW? [...]
A Year in Review
I can’t believe we are 2 weeks away from starting a new year! It seems that 2014 just began and, now, it will soon be over. If you are like most people, you are starting to set your goals and plan your resolutions for 2015. Before you jump in to full planning mode, I encourage you to take some time to reflect on how 2014. Humans are wired toward [...]
The Second Pillar: Gratitude
Because it is Thanksgiving week here in the U.S., today’s post is an excerpt on gratitude from my book Give From the Heart, Receive What you are Worth. Happy Thanksgiving! Gratitude is the second pillar on which to build your build your money mindset. Gratitude is a powerful antidote for fear and a poverty mentality. You can’t be focused on scarcity, lack and fear when you are focused on gratitude. [...]
How Do You Want to Feel in 2015?
On the recommendation of a trusted resource, I have been reading and working though Danielle LaPorte’s The Desire Map: A Guide to Creating Goals with Soul. She is funny and bold with an irreverent sense of humor. She combines many of the spiritual concepts I have been studying the last 20 years and uses them to help you develop a map for creating the life you want to live. Even [...]
What Do You Stand For?
We are living in an interesting age. As leaders, we are being called to claim our power, stand up for what we believe in and fight for what we think is right . . . . . but we must not offend anyone. Express yourself and be authentic . . . . but make sure everyone is comfortable with what you say. That’s a double bind if I’ve ever seen [...]
The Magic is in the Questions
John Maxwell has just released a new book, Good Leaders Ask Great Questions. I love this title and I am anxiously waiting for my copy to come in the mail. This title resonates with me so much because I LOVE asking questions. In fact, a big part of what make me so effective as a trusted adviser is not that I give awesome advice (which I do), it’s that I [...]
Business Lessons from a Female High School Football Coach
Several years ago I read an article about a woman who was picked to be the varsity coach for Calvin Coolidge High School, an inner city school in Washington DC. Natalie Randolph is one of the few women ever to coach a boys’ varsity football team. She is an amazing role model for not letting what other people’s opinions or what they think of you get in the way of [...]
Beware of the Stranger on the Bridge
A client sent me a story that I want to share with you. It’s a little long, but well worth the read. There was a man who had given much thought to what he wanted from life. After trying many things, succeeding at some and failing at others, he finally decided what he wanted. One day the opportunity came for him to experience exactly the way of living that he [...]
I Am Up for the Challenge, Are You?
Last week’s post, Trying to Catch My Breath, really struck a cord. I received a lot of positive feedback and expressions of gratitude from people for validating that they were not the only ones feeling the stress, compression and tension permeating the collective consciousness. As a result, I want to share a few more tips over the next few posts on how to turn your focus back to the positive [...]
Trying to Catch My Breath
I think there is something in the air recently. In my own business there has been an eerie stillness . . . . a feeling of constriction, as if I am waiting to inhale again. So I’ve done what I usually do, I reach out and talk to others. As a result, I have discovered that others are feeling it, too. It seems the pressures of a long down economy, [...]
How to Satisfy the Craving for Genuine Connection
With all of the advancements in technology, we have more ways than ever to “connect” and “communicate” with each other BUT we are actually connecting and communicating less than ever. Next time you are out in public, look around at how many people are staring down at their phones instead of engaging with the people around them, even people they are with. As many ways as there are to “connect” [...]
Can We Talk?
Since business is built on relationships, over the last few weeks I have been reaching out to all of my LinkedIn contacts asking if they are interested in connecting with me one on one so we can get to know each other, share about our business, identify needed resources and see if there is an opportunity to do business together. It has been an interesting and enlightening process. About [...]
Work Life Balance for Men?
With Father’s Day coming up on Sunday, there has been quite a bit of media focus on how challenging it is for men to balance bringing home the bacon with being actively involved in parenting. For years, the roles were really clear . . . men were the breadwinners and women were the caregivers. A man’s responsibility was to financially support the family, mow the lawn, fix things around the [...]
Do You Need a Preacher or a Teacher?
I have a question for you. It’s kind of a thinker so are you ready? How involved should a coach be in defining you, prioritizing your life and creating your big vision? This is a serious question that deserves serious consideration. I’m asking because I’ve noticed two main approaches in the coaching world – the Guru and the Wisdom Guide. The Gurus coach their clients from the frame of reference [...]
What Label Are You Wearing?
My daughter is in middle school. If you have had kids go through middle school, or if you are brave enough to remember back to your experience, you know what an important time it is in figuring out who you are and who you are not. It’s a time of labeling and categorizing everyone and everything, especially yourself. You begin to develop your idea of who you are, what you [...]
Money and Happiness
Today’s blog post is written by Terry Hill, a financial advisor who is dedicated to helping his clients create more happiness in their lives so they can make the world a better place. I love his philosophy and the way he serves his clients. Enjoy! “Happiness resides not in possessions and gold; the feeling of happiness dwells in the soul”- Democritus Recently I read an article about a successful investment [...]
Are You on a Crash Course to Burnout?
I had a friend who used to say, “If you want something done, give it to a busy person”. She’s right. I believe that time management is really self management. When I am busy and have more tasks than I have time to do them, I am AMAZED at how productive I am and how much I accomplish. The last few weeks have been scheduled with back to back tasks and [...]
The Business of YOU
I had the honor of being interviewed this week by a local radio personality, Dee Daniels from B101.5. Dee is a household name in my community as a result of the morning show she co-hosts with Chris Centore. She recently started a Sunday morning talk show interviewing local experts in the business community and asked me to talk about “The Business of YOU”. Dee is a true professional and, after [...]
The REAL Cost of Owning a Business
I recently read an article in Inc. Magazine’s September 2013 issue entitled “The Psychological Price of Entrepreneurship” written by Jessica Bruder. It’s a great article discussing the dark side of being an entrepreneur. . . . the side that nobody really wants to talk about. Sure, being an entrepreneur is great when things are going smoothly, “wins” are happening on a regular basis, money is pouring through the door and [...]
Are You Addicted to Overwhelm?
Being overwhelmed is a common issue these days. Life moves fast and business moves even faster. There are a thousand things everyday screaming for your attention and all of them need something NOW. Throw in big upheavals like divorce, serious illness, legal issues, severe financial stress . . . (the list could go on and on) and you are floundering in the sea of overwhelm. When you are overwhelmed, everything [...]
Creating Lasting Change for the New Year
Happy New Year! If you are like most people, you have begun thinking about your goals for 2014. There is a lot of good information out there in cyberspace on goal setting and how to accomplish what you want in your life and your business. Recently I was interviewed on a local TV show about making resolutions and setting goals. Today I’m going to share my perspective creating lasting change [...]
Are You Feeling Squeezed by the Great Wine Press of Life?
Last year on December 21st, the Mayan calendar came to an end. Despite all the doomsday predictions, civilization did not end and the human race has survived. Instead of collapse, this last year has seen a new energy emerging and a higher state of consciousness struggling to be born. The old paradigm of power and control with win/lose agendas is ending and a new paradigm of cooperation and negotiation with [...]
Do You Push Through the Suck?
One of the best pieces of advice I have received is from one of my crossfit coaches. We were talking about a particularly awful workout that was scheduled that day and possible strategies to get through it when she said, “It’s going to suck but you just have to push through the suck.” “Push through the suck” . . . those words really hit a chord with me. They got [...]
How Responsible are You?
Today I want to talk about responsibility. This is a very tricky subject with many layers so this will be an on-going conversation. But today, I will start with my basic theory on responsibility. Melanie’s Theory on Responsibility: When it comes to responsibility, there are basically 3 types of people in the world. Group 1: People who don’t like responsibility and want no part of taking any. No matter what [...]
“Suck it Up Buttercup” and other Not So Wise Business Advice
Suffering and sacrifice are essential elements of business, so when things get hard, you just have to dig in, work more, and press on the gas pedal a little harder to power through and reach that magical destination called success. Life is hard ... and owning your own business is even harder. There is no time for fun or playfulness or rest. You can rest when you are dead (I [...]
Which One of Your Personalities Do You Struggle with Most?
In his book, The E-Myth Revisited, Michael Gerber describes three distinct roles that business owners must perform – the Entrepreneur, the Manager and the Technician. Each role is distinct, relies on contrasting skill sets and is absolutely essential to building a successful business. Often, when a business is struggling it’s because the roles are out of balance and one (or more) of the areas is being ignored. Let me explain [...]
Are You Riding the Crazy Train?
Are you insane? I know that’s a strange and provocative question to ask but if you are like a lot of business owners, it’s a valid question for you to consider. Albert Einstein defined insanity as “doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result”. Sounds like a crazy thing to do, right? Well it is . . . and you have probably done it countless [...]
Networking Tips for Introverts
I have a confession to make . . . I don’t love networking meetings. I’ve never been really comfortable at large social gatherings. I don’t enjoy the superficial social chatting or the noise and environmental stimulation involved when large groups get together. They take a lot of energy for me and when I’m done, I’m exhausted. I do much better in one to one conversation or small intimate groups where [...]
Are Your Goals Holding You Back?
As the summer is winding down and the end of the year is quickly approaching, it’s a good time to have an honest conversation about goals. I know it may seem like a worn out topic since every business building and personal development book talks about the importance of setting goals. But here’s the thing . . . . despite knowing that they should have goals, many of the business [...]
Does Your Business Need a New Perspective?
“The only real voyage of Discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes” ~ Marcel Proust There is a fabulous bakery in my town. The sandwiches are fantastic and the pastries are to die for. One of the things that makes the bakery so special is that it is in a wonderful old church that used to be the Unitarian Fellowship. One day I was having [...]
You’ve Got Hate Mail
I want to talk about something that many people are uncomfortable thinking about let alone dealing with. . . . . hate mail. You know, those emails that come from your email subscribers, website visitors or Facebook friends who feel compelled to tell you what they don’t like about you, your opinion, your services, your website or your emails. Some are respectful about sharing their opinion and some, it seems, [...]
The Wisdom of Ferris Bueller
When was the last time you played hooky? You know, taking a day off to goof off and do only what you wanted to do? As a responsible adult, that probably seems like a silly question, right? Between running your business, taking care of your clients’ needs and doing what needs to be done for your family, there’s no time for goofing off. Yeah . . . . that’s my [...]
Is Godzilla Trampling Your Plans for Success?
We are trained from a very early age to be really good employees. We sit in assigned seats, we raise our hand to speak, we stand patiently in line and we seek validation from people with authority so that we feel good about our value and what we have to offer. We are taught that conformity and fitting in are safe. Well, you know what? They are safe . . [...]
Are You Creating Your Thoughts or Are Your Thoughts Creating You?
Over the last few years, I have read many books on successful people and on the Law of Attraction. The main point in all of them is that you are what you think. In fact, Napoleon Hill, author of Think and Grow Rich, considers our ability to control our thoughts and direct them to whatever ends we desire the greatest Divine gift of all. So why do so few of [...]
I Don’t Do Customer Service
I recently watched an episode of Bar Renovations in which they were helping a struggling comedy club clean up, rebrand and become profitable. One of the biggest issues was that the manager was so focused on what he wanted (to be on stage performing stand up) that he was completely ignoring the customer experience. When confronted, his response was, “I don’t do customer service, I do comedy”. While his is [...]
The Science of Happiness Part 2
Last time I talked about how science has found that happiness = success. Be happy first and success will follow. So, how does one do that? Well, Shawn Anchor (the author of The Happiness Advantage) said that in the Harvard study, they looked at the patterns and characteristics of people who are happy and successful and some common themes emerged. 1. Happy and successful people are optimistic. That means that [...]
The Science of Happiness
Let’s talk about happiness. Until the last few years, I had a messed up view of being happy. For me, happiness was often in the future. I’ll struggle and work hard now so I can be happy when I finish graduate school . . . when I get a promotion . . . . when I quit my job and start my own practice . . . when my daughter [...]
Being Powerfully YOU
“Authentic Marketing” is a popular phrase these days. It sounds great (because it really is) – but what does it really mean? Well, in my opinion, it means showing up in every interaction you have with people (including emails, sales pages, website, video, tele-classes, social media, sales conversations, networking events, speaking engagements and client appointments) as who you really are. That may sound like a “duh” statement, but it really [...]
How Much Time Are You Wasting Being Incompetent?
Last year I read The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks. It was a fantastic book and I did something I rarely do with a book – I read it a second time. It’s not that what he shared was new information for me, it’s that it pulled information that I know together in a different and very helpful way. I’d like to share some of the wisdom I gleaned from [...]
Business Planning for SMART People
Do you have a written business plan? If you are like many service professionals, you either have one you wrote when you started your business that is sitting on your shelf and hasn’t been looked at in ages OR it is on your “I really need to get that done someday” list. What you may not realize is that not having a business plan that you refer to on a [...]
Are you Making Wishes or Setting Goals?
I was recently talking with a friend and colleague of mine. We were talking about how there are some people who say they want one thing, but the behaviors and actions being taken say something completely different. This is where my years of experience with human behavior and my gift of seeing underlying patterns that sabotage success come in handy. Being incongruent between stated goals and actions taken is very [...]
Capitalism: Abuse of Power or a Path to Empowerment?
Let’s talk about capitalism. This is a subject I have been thinking a lot about recently. I am currently reading the book Conscious Capitalism: Liberating the Heroic Spirit of Business by John Mackey, the Founder and Co-CEO of Whole Foods Market. The truth is that capitalism has gotten a bad rap in the last few decades. In fact, there are people in the world who would love to see free [...]
Do You Bounce or Splat?
I recently listened to an interview with Darren Hardy, the founder of Success Magazine. He talked about what happens when things don’t go the way we plan in business and in life. You know, those things that shake your confidence, affect your identity or turn your world upside down . . . divorce, death of a loved one, a serious health crises, bankruptcy, closing a business, downsizing, foreclosure and natural [...]
3 Steps to Mastering the Mental Game of Business
Life always provides us an opportunity to learn. My daughter participated in a horse back riding clinic recently. The instructor shared this wisdom with the kids “Riding is mostly a mental game. There is skill and technique involved, but mostly it’s mental. Focus on what can go right, not what can go wrong.” As I thought about this advice, I realized it is true of business as well. Business is [...]
The 3 Critical Areas that Will Determine Your Success this Year
I was listening to an interview with Darren Hardy from Success Magazine recently. He stated that we are living in the best time, ripe with opportunity and possibility in the history of our country. Given all the craziness in the American Government and the doom and gloom predictions of the global economy, it gave me pause for thought. He went on to explain that because of the rapidly changing technology, [...]
Business Lessons I Have Learned from Crossfit
Whether you think you can or you can’t, either way you are right. ~ Henry Ford One of the things that I have learned is that business and life lessons are everywhere if you are willing to see them. As you know, I regularly talk about the life lessons my daughter learns at the barn. I share them because they also apply to business. In the last few [...]
The Lone Cow
The Lone Cow (author unknown) A wise man was walking with his student and conversing about the importance of visiting new places and meeting new people, and the knowledge one can gain from these experiences. They came upon a very poor area and passed a rundown house where they saw a couple with their children. All five were dressed in torn clothes and no shoes. The house was severely neglected. [...]
Do You Answer When Opportunity Knocks?
I’m talking about “opportunity”. I love this word – it conjures up images of hope and possibility. Many people are in a constant state of waiting for a great opportunity to arrive. They secretly believe that the perfect opportunity will transform their business (and life) into everything they ever wanted. Does this sound like you? If so, I have a secret. Ready to hear it?? Opportunity never arrives, it’s [...]
WHY Are You Doing THAT?
When I was in graduate school getting my MSW, I was taught never to start a question with “why”. I understand that reasoning and for the most part I agree with it. During interactions with others, “why” puts people on the defensive and can imply that they made a wrong choice or are doing something wrong. Asking “why” can shut down a conversation instead of opening it up and moving [...]
Is That the Best You’ve Got?!?
Many years ago I read The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it. In the book, Ruiz shares four agreements you must make with yourself to live a happy and fulfilled life. All four seem like simple common sense . . . Be impeccable with your word . . . . Don’t take anything personally . . . . . Don’t make [...]
Are you Wrapped Too Tight or Too Loose?
My favorite professor in Graduate School had a simple but profound approach to working with people. His theory was that people were either wrapped too tight or wrapped too loose. He believed that if they were wrapped too tight, his job was to help loosen them up and if they were wrapped too loose, his job was to help tighten them up. This theory resonated with me and I have [...]
Michael Phelps, The U.S Women’s Gymnastics Team and You . . . . A Lesson in Greatness
We have been watching the Olympics this last week. Have you? It’s been wonderful to see sports that never get TV coverage being celebrated as their athletes put everything on the line to win. There is something inspiring about watching people embrace their greatness and perform in their brilliance. As inspiring as it is, there is also a downside to watching world class athletes preform at unfathomable levels physical skill, [...]
Success is 10% what you DO and 90% what you THINK
Many of us are addicted to doing. We measure our self worth and success on how much we get done and how productive we are. Based on my twenty plus years of studying human behavior and working closely with people to create change in all areas of their life, I can tell you that your success is not about what you do, it’s about who you think you are and [...]
Are You Feeling Lost in the Crowd?
I have never loved crowds. I like to have a lot of open space around me. That’s why shopping at the mall during the holidays or living in a big city is not really my thing. In the business world, breaking away from the crowd has been referred to as The Blue Ocean Strategy or finding The Purple Cow (both are great books, by the way). It’s about figuring out [...]
I Don’t Have Enough Time to Get it All Done!
The two biggest areas where poverty consciousness rears its ugly head are time and money. “I don’t have enough money” and “I don’t have enough time” are common mantras for many of us. I have talked about money in many of my previous articles so today I want to talk about time. Time management is a hot topic in recent years. There are all kinds of tools, techniques and trainings [...]
The 7 Secrets to Succeeding in any Economy
No matter where you are in your business life (just starting out or been around the block a few times, there are important things you must do to make sure you and your business are set to handle roller coaster economies and uncertain times. Know your story. Last week I wrote about how your world view is formed early in life and that drives the stories you tell yourself about [...]
How are You Measuring Up?
During a recent interview, I was asked what piece of wisdom or advice I would want to go back and give myself when I was first starting my business. After thinking about it, I would want to let myself know that building your business is not a completion and it is not a race. Knowing this would have saved me a lot of heart ache over the years. It’s human [...]